Growing up, I’ve heard many adults say, “Don’t date while you’re still in school or else you’ll get bad grades!”. I’ve tried to abide by that rule, but what ended up happening was that I would date in secret and lie about my relationship status to my family.
At the time, I kept thinking about that saying and reminding myself that I was keeping a secret, and I need to keep up my grades so that the secret won’t be revealed. With this mentality, I was able to keep up my grades and get into a well respected university. During that time, I had a feeling that my parents might have known about what was going on in my personal life, but didn’t really say anything about it explicitly because there wasn’t a reason for them to scold me. I wasn’t getting bad grades, and I wasn’t become a “bad child”.
In university, I was surprisingly single until halfway through my third year. During that time, my grades weren’t that bad but they weren’t exceptionally good either. I thought that maybe because I had more time to focus on school work, I’ll be able increase my average. I couldn’t have been more wrong. At the beginning, I spent a lot of time studying but my grades still remained around the same average as before. After some time has passed, I realized that I’m not one of those individuals who can sit in front of a textbook and just study for hours on end. I get restless and unproductive. Because of this, I’ve learned to take breaks when needed and get as much work done as I possibly can when I am motivated and focused. By doing this, I realized that overall, I was spending less time studying, but my grades has still been rather consistent. Then, earlier this year, I met a guy and got into a relationship. One question that was constantly running through my mind is if my grades were going to fall because of this change in status. After a little while, I realized that not only were my grades not slipping, but I was a lot happier than I was before. Through this realization, I’ve learned that the saying really doesn’t work on everyone. It really depends on who you are as a person and how you prioritize things.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that being in a relationship could be harmful to other aspects of your life if you let it. But, it’s not going to be the sole determination between what breaks you and what makes you. If you’re able to set your priorities straight and manage your time, the saying “Don’t date while you’re still in school or else you’ll get bad grades” is all that it is… A saying.